Thursday, Aug. 24
Bike ride: Stow/Hudson Bike and Hike
As I mounted my bike under beautiful blue skies and a light wind, I was feeling confident that this ride would be like all my others: rejuvenating.
After working all day, I love to get out on my bike and become one with the wind and nature. I feel invincible – like Billie Jean – what was the name of that movie? Pat Benatar, my favorite rock singer produced the main song “Invincible”
Invincible I wasn’t. After five specific mishaps on the bike, about 12 miles in, I decided it was time to head home.
Mishap one: While riding on Stow road (headed toward 303) I hit a “small” bump in the road. My repair kit, which contains everything I need to repair a flat tire: spare tube, CO2 cartridge/dispenser and levers to help remove the tube slipped out the rear water bottle holder and landed in the middle of the road.
I dropped my bike, gently, very gently and ran like an unsteady child (cycling shoes have a metal plate on the bottom and are very slippery -small steps are vital, as the potential to fall is great) to were my repair kit landed, about 100 yards back.
I wasn’t quick enough to retrieve the kit before a semi and four cars ran it over. I am sure I looked quite silly standing there with my hands over my eyes.
The casulties: The semi destoyed the kit, it was ripped, torn and dirty, and the CO2 dispenser was in pieces. The CO2 cartridge was intact, but I was afraid it would explode at some point, so I pitched it – sorry, but I figured it was better in the woods than on my person. If it exploded on or near me, it would have been like a mini mine exploding …
Mishap two: As I approached the Bike & Hike, I hit another “small” bump and this time both of my water bottles fell to the ground. Fortunately there weren’t any cars behind me. I was a little annoyed …
I tightened the holders, shoved the bottles in and continued riding.
Mishap three: Not sure if this was a mishap or just one of the oddities of the day. A young boy, about the age of 17 was riding his bike. I didn’t pay much attention to him, even thought he was adjusting himself – aggressively. Guys do this from time to time – no, all the time. Sitting, standing, running, etc, it doesn’t matter, when the urge hits, they dig in. Do guys realize how inappropriate that looks?
Mishap four: In aero position (tri bike) you look straight ahead and focus on the terrain. Gotta watch out for those “small” bumps. At this point in my ride, I was paying attention to every “small” bump in my path. At approximately 20 mph, a low flying, black- 747 with buzzing wings struck my sunglasses – smack! I wasn’t going fast enough for bug guts to be splattered across my lenses but fast enough that it slapped the bug into the vents of my helmet. Yes, the bug is now stuck in my hair. I can feel it squirming.
I sit upright, take off my helmet and pull the bug out of my hair. With the bug in hand I am now screaming -like a girl, because I am touching it and I don’t know exactly what it is; I just know it’s big and it is in my hand.
Riding without hands is OK if you are paying attention to the ground; I was not. I swerve and almost fall. Tha steep hill ahead of my is quickly approaching. The dare devil in me is trying to ride the hill, with no hands while adjusting my helmet. What was I thinking?
It is a this point I decided to turn around. As I am heading back, Mishap five takes place. What I thought was an oddity before, ya know the the boy adjusting himself, turned out to be a young pervert, fondling and exposing himself. After I picked my jaw up, I turned around and began to follow the boy.
I was on a mission to stop him and his dis-GUST-ting game. He knew I was following him so he turned off the trail and headed up Norton Road. He darted behind the McD’s for a few minutes then darted out again, in hopes that I wouldn’t see him.
Long story short, I finally get in touch with the Stow dispatch, give them the details and head home.
I am not sure if any of my remaining rides, this summer, will top this one, but then again, I am not interested in the “unique” rides, just the ones that rejuvenate.
What can I say, I grew up with a father and brother who were pranksters. 
